The Voidian Officials, Alcor, Caroli and Situla, were sat on an island, going through their supplies and having something to eat as they talked quietly.
“So!” Alcor announced. “What do you think these humans are like, then?”
“Considering the one we just saw, I’d say they’re pretty inadequate. I just genuinely can’t believe that Raziel thought a few of those scrawny psychics could defeat the Kings.” Caroli said.
“I know, what was he on when he thought up this plan?” Situla replied with a laugh.
Alcor nodded, and tucked into a piece of bread topped with butter. “Mm, these snacks are divine!”
“It was what I could pack in the short time we had to prepare. Don’t eat too much, I’m not sure how much we’ve got. Hopefully we won’t be out too long.” Situla said. “Once we’ve got a bit further into the Reaches, we can message Yasen and co-ordinate in such a way that we can meet up conveniently.”
“Then what?” asked Caroli.
“Then we intervene heroically!” replied Alcor. “Yasen is a murderer, who knows what madness she could be planning! Best to have the children in the hands of Officials who haven’t gone rogue!”
“Oh, I see. That makes sense. Though… we really don’t want to upset the Zionid Officials. Just because Vasa’s told Denneb something, doesn’t mean it’s true. We have to ensure, when we meet up, that Yasen is indeed off the grid.” Situla said. Alcor nodded. “Of course.”
“Ngh. I was going to do an impression of Yasen, but I’ve realised I don’t know her accent that well.” Caroli sighed.
“You do a terrible Zionid accent, it must be said.” interjected Situla with a grin. Caroli playfully punched her armoured shoulder.
After ten minutes or so, they spotted something in the distance.
“Lost ones.” muttered Situla. “Ugh, they give me the creeps.”
“Alcor? I do believe it’s the job of the strong and noble Official to fight battles in the Reaches…” said Caroli, lacing her words with sweetness. Alcor shrugged.
“Alright, alright. You two are just as competent, though.”
“More competent, I think you’ll find.” said Situla, absentmindedly adjusting her armour. Alcor sighed and readied his blade as the cries of the lost ones grew louder. There was just two.
Alcor charged to the edge of the island, and beheaded one of the lost ones with a single mighty swing of his sword. The other lunged brokenly at him, and he leapt backwards, before jumping on the lost one’s back and driving his sword through the creature’s neck, impaling it in the ground. It crumbled to dust moments later.
“Oh, lordy, Al. You don’t have to be quite so vicious.” winced Caroli. Alcor posed. “You’re mistaken, ladies! A true hero puts 110% into all that he does!”
“Like acting awkward around the ladies? You sure to put all your effort into that.” purred Situla. Alcor shivered and returned to the centre of the island, muttering “Yes, yes, calm it down, now. I am technically your boss.”
“So why did you send Denneb away? You know, if you want him to like you back, the first thing you should do is spend more sodding time with him.” Caroli said, then she began to ape Denneb. “Oh, Alcor, all these extra shifts I’ve been spent working with you, alone… make me feel so manly and strong. Come on Alcor, make me feel even manlier by bringing your lips over here and-”
“CAROLI I SWEAR I’LL HAVE YOU FIRED.” replied Alcor, with his flushed, burning red face buried between his legs in embarrassment. Caroli and Situla laughed to themselves, but Caroli relented and didn’t continue the impression.
“For your information,” Alcor replied a few minutes later. “I thought it best to deal with all this children stuff before I tried spending more time with Denneb. He gets very excited when in a situation where his knowledge of the universe is relevant, so it’d be a waste to perform my heroic acts around him when he’s too distracted by words written on a page!”
“I’m impressed.” Situla said. “That’s quite thoughtful of you. In a backwards kinda way.”
“…Thanks.” Alcor replied gruffly. “Uh, can’t we discuss you two instead? Any love lives going on that you’d care to tell your old boss?”
“Well, gee, that’s a personal question, Al.” replied Caroli in mock offense. “Personally, no. No love life of any kind, not since…”
“I understand.” interjected Alcor quickly, seeing Caroli’s normally happy grin fade. He knew what she was remembering, and he preferred it when she didn’t have it on her mind, as it was one of the few things that made her genuinely glum.
“Meanwhile, I’ve been getting my flirt on with Rana.” Situla said. “…Not getting anywhere though. She’s pretty fucking taciturn about my kisses on the end of my messages. And she never sends kisses back.”
“Maybe message her?” suggested Alcor. “Now, whilst we’re spending many hours travelling; you’ll need something to take your mind of this immense boredom that is navigating the Reaches!”
“Yeah, later.” Situla said with a lazy hand gesture.
“As you wish. Anyway, Alcor, I wasn’t kidding before. That was an oddly personal question for you.” Caroli said, with a light-hearted tone that belied her intentions.
“Oh, you know. I, uh, have a mild interest in the happiness of my coworkers.” Alcor replied, averting his eyes and going on his wrist phone.
“Well, it’s nice. We’re your favourites, right?” Caroli pressed, putting on a more seductive voice. Alcor shivered, shying away from Caroli’s smiling face. “I, uh, I guess so..? If I say yes, will you stop moving towards me slowly?”
“Sure.” Caroli said, grinning at Situla. “Anyway, how long d’you think we’ll be travelling straight for?”
“Probably a few hours,” said Situla, who had travelled the Reaches before. “There’s some other islands nearby, so if this one veers off-course we can always move to another one.”
Alcor, meanwhile, was messaging Saiph.
Hello!! Al
Sa sup al, how’re things, homeslice?
They are acceptable! I am travelling through the Reaches heroically! Al
Well… Al
I am travelling with the two terrors. Al
Not particularly. Just making me all FLUSTERED! Al
Less sarcasm, please. Al
What are you doing? Besides, you know, hiding psychic children under my nose? Al
“Lost one.” observed Situla.
“Oho!” cried Caroli, performing as Alcor. “I shall smite this here monster and protect these lovely ladies with my massive, throbbing blade of manliness! Only then will I be able to plunge it deep into Denneb!”
Situla burst out laughing, rolling back and forth on the ground. Alcor, in the middle of messaging, had only partly registered what Caroli had said, and was still tapping away on his wrist phone. Caroli drew her sword, waited for the lost one to approach the island, and with two quick slashes, obliterated it. She sheathed the sword again and took a bow as Caroli nodded in appreciation of the fine swordplay.
“Well, this is going to be a long trip. Might as well take a nap.” Caroli said as she flopped down beside Situla.
“Sounds good to me. Al, you’ll keep us safe, yeah?”
“Uh, sure.” Alcor replied. “I’ll do my utmost to defend this island with my dying breath!”
As the girls lay down to rest, Alcor got a reply from Saiph.
…I believe you because I trust you, Saiph. Al
I understand your PROBLEM!! Al
But listen, Saiph! You do what YOU think is RIGHT! Al
Anyway, I’ve just been ordered to defend this island as the two ladies sleep! Al
Goodbye, fellow hero! Al
The two Voidian Officials were soon sleeping soundly, with their helmets modified to cover their ears. Alcor sighed and resigned himself to staring out amongst the wasteland of colours, keeping a watchful eye out for lost ones, Zionids, or psychic children.
Hanging above him, the dreadful black spot in the sky was a portent of doom, reminding him constantly that he was fighting for the protection of the universe.
The island sailed on, not caring for the fearsome spot in the sky.
